Deiv Anand makes autobiographical movie: sues himself for defamation

Bollywood veteran Deiv Anand launched his latest movie 'What was I thinking?', touted to be the man's swan-song. Jacky Shroff plays Deiv Anand in this semi-autobiographical movie and also four other roles. 'I always like working with fresh faces like Jacky' said Deiv saab, forgetting that Jacky dada is a veteran himself.

The story is of a film-maker whose life follows a strange pattern. For each hit that he delivers, 50 of his movies flop. At least that's what he thinks till his 52nd movie also flops, shattering his hope and dream of one day making a movie that people other than him actually watch.

'I'm as nervous as I was last year when Guide was released' Deiv saab chatters on incoherently, 'I only wish someone would watch this bloody movie'

He also confirmed rumours that he was taking action against himself and the producer, again himself, for having depicted himself in a bad light in the movie. 'There are creative boundaries that should not be crossed, which I'm sad to say have been crossed, despite my warnings. It's alright to imitate me but I have to admit I was hurt watching the rushes, at being caricatured like this. I have filed for damages amounting to Re 1, which will cover Jackie's salary if not anything else' he roared.

India leads tally in SMS-Olympics : Deepica Paducone wins High Jump

For the 5th consecutive day, the Indian contingent led the medals tally in the 2008 SMS-Olympics held in Delhi but mostly on the portal vote-for-gold.com. Readers will know the innovative format of this competition, where a list of nominees is submitted a month in advance by each country and medals are decided during the olympics on a majority of SMS votes. Deepica Paducone won the women's singles tennis gold 6-0, 6-0 against Maria Sarapova, who was expected to put up a tough fight especially after posing in revealing costumes for Playboy in March this year. Sania Mizra narrowly missed out in the women's doubles because of a wrist injury. 'Couldn't send enough sms'es. My surgery is affecting my performance' she said. Deepica also won 17 other gold medals in unrelated events - high jump, badminton, swimming, diving and gymnastics, taking India's tally to 405 golds in the competition so far. This is in addition to the sms-oscars she won last month for best actress, actor, newcomer, child artiste, light boy and stunt double. 'What a gift to give the country on a long weekend! Deepica reflects the hope of a generation' said the Union Sports Minister in an interview yesterday. 'Even when she was in school, she used to be terrible', her school teacher remembered fondly.

Definitions for the corporate rookie - I

Exposure : A powerful and easy way of extracting work from the innocent. It just means you have to work hard now so that you can get used to it and work hard later.
Challenge : Euphemism for shit work that no one else is willing to do.
Adversity : Synonym of shit - coined because it rhymes with many more words than shit and hence lends itself to poetry.
Learning : If your income is too small to justify the quantum of your work and you also believe you are higher on Maslow's than you actually are, this will do the trick.
Proactiveness : A trait that is used to fast-track the stupid ahead of the innocents.
Team player : A trait used to fast-track the vending-machine flirts ahead of the working innocents.
High quality work : Low quality work
Talent : Human beings
Genius : Human beings who turn up for work