Facebook buys school dropout for 200 mn

Dave Krap, all of 16 years old, still can't believe what's happening around him. The saga began late last year, when he decided to drop out of Tumble High, a prestigious school in South Connecticut. 'He was always at his comp, awake all night. And I imagine he slept through all his classes', his mom says, beaming. Little wonder then, that his parents received a notice from school, asking whether he would like to drop out voluntarily to make things less unpleasant.
'I just figured I could spend more time with my friend Lenny, y'know' says Krap. Lenny was the name he'd given his old PC. He had no idea Facebook was on the prowl, looking for someone exactly like him. Bad hygiene, poor social skills, drop out, weird - Facebook had no doubt that Krap was a worthwhile investment. His parents didn't object, fortunately.
'We plan to buy at least 10 school dropouts and give them computers with internet access. That would really increase our chances of being the next big thing, apart from being the current big thing.' said a Facebook spokesperson. 'Ever since we blocked porn, Krap's started hanging out at a local pub instead of spending time at his comp, so that's a challenge' he added. 'Well, at least we are stopping Yahoo from getting at the next big thing as long as Krap's kept occupied.'